Episodes
Thursday May 26, 2022
Caregivers and the No Huddle Offense
Thursday May 26, 2022
Thursday May 26, 2022
As a caregiver, do you ever feel you are pushing yourself in the "No Huddle Offense" and not taking time to build a plan - all while the "clock" serves as your enemy?
Well, I know I do. So I talked about this in today's episode.
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Tuesday May 17, 2022
They Raised Two Children With Huntington’s Disease
Tuesday May 17, 2022
Tuesday May 17, 2022
May Is HD Awareness month, and our guests for this episode were Drs. Elton and Laquita Higgs. The couple adopted a little girl many years ago - who developed Huntington's Disease (HD). One of the most horrific diseases on the planet, HD eventually cost their daughter her life - but not before she had a daughter who also developed the genetic (and terminal) illness.
Listen to their inspiring and insightful story - from their book, SHATTERED DREAMS - BUT HOPE: Encouragement for Caregivers of Huntington’s Disease and Other Progressive Illnesses
For more information on HD, please visit HDSA.org (The Huntington’s Disease Society of America)
Saturday Feb 26, 2022
Caregiving Versus Caregiver
Saturday Feb 26, 2022
Saturday Feb 26, 2022
Today's show features an opening monologue about Caregiving versus Caregiver. Also, a surgeon caught me by surprise with this question. Later on in the program, a special interview with one of the founders of crowd funders GIVE SEND GO, and a special song from Gracie.
Saturday Jan 15, 2022
A Path Through the Storm
Saturday Jan 15, 2022
Saturday Jan 15, 2022
Imagine trying to build a five-year plan while simultaneously working to survive a hurricane. Incredulously, many caregivers regularly attempt such a feat.
Saturday Jan 08, 2022
Asking Better Questions
Saturday Jan 08, 2022
Saturday Jan 08, 2022
Rabbi Eric Walker joined me again to talk about the questions we ask when faced with challenging circumstances.
Check out his website at www.ignitinganation.com
Sunday Jan 02, 2022
Strep Triggered Something Far Worse For Their Son
Sunday Jan 02, 2022
Sunday Jan 02, 2022
Chris and Shelley Snitko struggled to understand what was going on with their 8-year boy who came down with Strep that served as a catalyst for something far worse. While his twin brother also came down with Strep, he went to recover and live a normal life. But A.J. did not.
When they finally learned, it sent them on a painful journey and eventually a path of redemption and restoration that neither expected.
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Wednesday Nov 24, 2021
There Used To Be M & M‘s
Wednesday Nov 24, 2021
Wednesday Nov 24, 2021
For as long as I can remember, when my father arrived home from reserve duty in the military, he brought each of my brothers and my sister a pack of M & M’s. Extending past his service as a naval officer, he and my mother continued the tradition when we returned from college. Each time we showed up with our luggage (sometimes filled with dirty laundry), we’d walk into our rooms to find a bag of M&M’s waiting on the pillow.
When they moved from the house where they raised five sons and a daughter, their new home carried the custom. Bringing our spouses, then children, and now even our grandchildren, the familiar brown-bagged treats (sometimes the yellow bags of peanut M&M’s) from my parents awaited every family member.
Except for this year.
Nearly succumbing to congestive heart failure, my mother endured a dramatic and challenging year—as did my father. A US Naval officer and pastor for almost 60 years, my father stepped into the role of caregiver for the first time, and I watched the process take a toll on him.
It felt odd. While I’ve cared for my wife with severe disabilities for more than 35 years, I’ve never seen my dad in this role. I found myself placing a hand on his shoulder, much like he did for me many times following my wife’s now eighty-plus operations. He sat with me in countless ICUs, hospital rooms, and waiting rooms. Now I sat with him.
His seasoned faith remains intact and strong, yet he struggled to wrap his mind around the relentless assault of continued medical setbacks. With the same gentleness and encouragement he offered to me over decades of caregiving, I returned the favor.
I’ve often heard that “…There’s no pain like watching your children hurt.”
Watching your parents hurt must run a close second.
With a herculean effort by medical staff, along with my mother’s grit, she pulled through. While not where she’d like to be, she’s further than most expected. After a couple of months away, we returned to their home for the Thanksgiving holidays. They look tired, older, but optimistic. The family pulled together, and the house looks great. The only significant difference I noticed was an oxygen tank in their bedroom.
For the first time in my memory, however, no M & M’s waited on the pillows. The absence of those treats indicates a passage and a farewell to parts of who they used to be. Their home stands in a heavily wooded area of upstate South Carolina. As we prepare for Thanksgiving, the trees surrounding their home continue shedding an entire color palate of leaves. The loveliness of autumn is a sad one that brushes hearts the same way the wind grazes branches.
So it is when watching those who loomed large in our lives diminish in vigor, but not in beauty. As many will attest, it’s the shedding of small things—the wisps of everyday things taken for granted—that often bring a tear.
During holidays, deep feelings seem to rise to the surface faster than other times. For many Americans, Thanksgiving marks the beginning of a difficult season of slow goodbyes, bittersweet celebrations, and, for some, the ache of absence.
Yet, not all is sorrow. Slowing our lifestyles to the pace of our hearts, we can cling to each other a bit tighter. After dinner, we can pause a little longer at the table—or sit quietly for an extra couple of minutes with those we love. If a chair is empty, we can choose to fill that seat with cherished memories.
Families across our country feel this kind of heartache— one so deeply connected to caregiving. Helping those caregivers is no easy task. Yet, that help remains critical to not only the caregiver but also their loved one. Part of that help is assisting caregivers in grieving without them sinking into despair. Doing so always involves redirecting our gaze to gratitude.
The treats I’ve enjoyed for a lifetime no longer await me, but the loving hands that placed them are still here to hold. Placing that candy on their pillows instead, I now possess a greater understanding of the joy they both shared—for a lifetime.
This Thanksgiving, I discovered gratitude can be found in something as simple as a bag of M & M’s.
Grief is the price we pay for love. Queen Elizabeth II